I know that I{ve been writing blogs the American way this whole time (Patriotic and humble), but because I{m stuck with a Bolivian keyboard, I thought I{d give you a taste of Bolivia by typing up a blog using this [crazy[ keyboard. So instead of apostrophe{s, you{ll see brackets and instead of quotes you{ll see that other kind of weird bracket.
So I just got back from Country Gooding Junior (a country so wacky that they named an actor after it) and boy is my liberty tired. I{m not aloud to say the name, but it{s famous for the trade embargo imposed on it and t-shirts with some dude named Chet on them. It was like that time that Sam Becket got sent back in time to the 1950}s and had to prevent a vanguard revolution and he couldn{t figure out why he couldn{t leap until he realized it wasn{t the revolution he had to stop, but the marriage a dictator to his highschool sweetheart who everyone knew he didn{t really love, thus saving space-time-God-everything forever. It was an okay episode.
This week, a woman named Aydee who works at our clinic was put into the hospital to have a cardiac cathederization. This procedure will reveal whether or not she needs to have an open heart surgery, a stent, or not. It is very expensive and the surgery is even more expensive. The procedure itself will cost around 600 dollars, which is a fifth of our budget for a month, and the surgery might end up costing around 6,000 dollars. So this is a pretty big thing. Normally our surgeries for the month, we do one or two, cost around 200-300 dollars total. She works for us and lives with us at the clinic, so are going to do it everything we need to, whereas normally we might have to discuss it some more.
As I was not in Bolivia last week (the country where the famous Chet Gutenberg was killed by the Center for Immunizing Animals, a major agency for the Unlimited Stuff for All-People), the volunteers had to survive without me. And did they ever! They sent two patients to Santa Cruz, the big city, to be seen by specialists and took really good notes for me for when I got back from Country Gooding Jr.
This week we{re going to cook Thanksgiving dinner (turkey burgers and egg nog) at the clinic and in Santa Cruz. That{s two more dinners than the piligrims ever had with the indians, which is zero.
I will be going back to Chicago in December, but I{ll be staying here for all of next year, unless the Center for Immunizing Animals has anything to say about it.
¡Peace out!
¡mike!
lunes, 19 de noviembre de 2007
miércoles, 31 de octubre de 2007
Golb!!bloG
There ain't nothin' like a fresh blog in the morning! And boy is this blog fresh. If you rearrange the letters in the previous sentence, you can spell: And frog boy hits Slibesh. Boy, I feel bad for Slibesh.
As you all know, today is All Saints Day to honor the day that all the saints died. Everyone dresses up like Saints and goes door to door throwing eggs at people dressed like witches. As for me, I'm going dressed as Saint #3. In Bolivia, Halloween is a new thing and we bought candy but we're not sure if anyone is going to come get it. We're going to throw a party.
I stayed in Santa Cruz this week and worked on getting this lady a hysterectomy and went to the doctor to get my hernia (and ascending testicle) looked at. The latter, apparently, is a result of the former. They're not going to operate on my hernia yet. If it gets worse then maybe, but for now I'm just going to take medicine. The lady will probably have the surgery next week.
We started working on planning a series of surgeries for December when a surgeon named Janice Duke comes. She's going to do some hysterectomy things and things in a local hospital near the clinic. It's pretty exciting because it seems like with this hospital's help, we might be able to perform more surgeries more easily.
Next week I'm going to a little country that I cannot say the name of with a couple people. Let's just say its an island with an embargo and dying dictator on it. I can't say anymore or else they'll put me in a prison on that island. I'm excited to smoke Cuban cigars!
Soon the next coordinator will be coming and I will have to tell her how to do the job. Wish her luck!
Blog!
mike
As you all know, today is All Saints Day to honor the day that all the saints died. Everyone dresses up like Saints and goes door to door throwing eggs at people dressed like witches. As for me, I'm going dressed as Saint #3. In Bolivia, Halloween is a new thing and we bought candy but we're not sure if anyone is going to come get it. We're going to throw a party.
I stayed in Santa Cruz this week and worked on getting this lady a hysterectomy and went to the doctor to get my hernia (and ascending testicle) looked at. The latter, apparently, is a result of the former. They're not going to operate on my hernia yet. If it gets worse then maybe, but for now I'm just going to take medicine. The lady will probably have the surgery next week.
We started working on planning a series of surgeries for December when a surgeon named Janice Duke comes. She's going to do some hysterectomy things and things in a local hospital near the clinic. It's pretty exciting because it seems like with this hospital's help, we might be able to perform more surgeries more easily.
Next week I'm going to a little country that I cannot say the name of with a couple people. Let's just say its an island with an embargo and dying dictator on it. I can't say anymore or else they'll put me in a prison on that island. I'm excited to smoke Cuban cigars!
Soon the next coordinator will be coming and I will have to tell her how to do the job. Wish her luck!
Blog!
mike
miércoles, 17 de octubre de 2007
Blog Fever!
Sorry, Loyal Fans and Readers. I was sick. I had it real bad. A real bad case of Blog Fever! I couldn't stop thinking about Blogs. It was like every time I tried to blog I would get so excited that a fever would set in and I couldn't even blog. So I just relaxed and controlled the flow of blog thoughts to the mind until I could sit still long enough to just a blog a little bit before I went crazy.
So, since we had our last intimate conversation, Centro Medico Humberto Parra has had a whole bunch of volunteers and patients. All of the old med students and residents have left and been replaced by two female residents, a female med student, a male med student named my brother Ethan, a female nurse, and a couple of love birds who just flew in to help with "green" energy for the clinic and cervical cancer screening. Also, my mom is here, right now, starring over my shoulder and chuckling about the word "blog". I told her, "That's not funny, mom! Blogs are serious business!" But she'll never understand. Also three doctors were here. (In reverse alphabetical order) One's name was Steve, another was John, and another was Amish. Amish surfs, John plays guitar (like a real pro!), and Steve gets overly excited and spouts facts about trees uncontrollably. Here's something he said once: "Man, if you brought a pair of binoculars out here to the clinic, you could have a field day! Holy cow!" A typical conversation with Steve went:
Schlomo: Hey, Steve.
Steve: Holy cow! I can't believe it's you! I haven't seen you in like 5 minutes!
Schlomo: I've got bad news, Steve.
Steve: Great! I love news!
Schlomo: Brad Pitt died today.
Steve: What?! I can't believe it! That's terrible!
Schlomo: Hey, Steve, check out that ant hill!
Steve: Holy cow! What the hell do you thinks inside that thing? I'd love to get a hold of a hammer so I could see inside there!
So he was fun. Me and Gretchen, the nurse, translated for him and John because they're Spanish was not great. Then we had a party for my mom. It was an aloha party. John sang a song, Derek sang a song, I sang a song, and Dr. Suarez a Bolivian doctor from the Hopsital Japones sang "I can't take my eyes off of you" in Spanish. It was beautiful. I wept like a willow and lept like a frog! Or should I say, I weeped like a weelow and leaped like a frog.
I went to Samipata, the ancient city where different indigenous groups thrived (such as the Incans, the Spanish, and the Nazis). We stayed at La Vispera, a quaint little Dutch hotel/cabin place and I asked them if they would hire me, they didn't say no.
A man had a tracheotomy and can breathe a lot better. My brother helped him replace his trachea ring. He is very sweet and wrote me a little note (when he couldn't talk) that said thanks and that he can breathe tranquilly. A man came in with carcinoma and, although we cannot save his life, we are going to give him radio therapy and control his diabetes so that he might be able to live more comfortably. We are also working on getting a woman double header surgery, which will involve the removal of a polyp on her uterus and a reparation of her hernia. Man, I tell you, I haven't seen so many hernias in my life. One time I saw a fat man in a polo, but that's not quite the same thing. I also saw Rush Hour 3. Don't stop making 'em, boys!
I should also note that I got four strikes in a row in bowling, raising my score from 22 to something like 102. I was kind of "out of it" so it was a big surprise to everyone playing. I think we still lost. Also, Derek, the "green" energy guy, said this funny thing. I was putting my pants on one morning and he says to me, "Wait. You put your pants on one leg at a time?" It was the funniest thing I'd ever heard.
mike
So, since we had our last intimate conversation, Centro Medico Humberto Parra has had a whole bunch of volunteers and patients. All of the old med students and residents have left and been replaced by two female residents, a female med student, a male med student named my brother Ethan, a female nurse, and a couple of love birds who just flew in to help with "green" energy for the clinic and cervical cancer screening. Also, my mom is here, right now, starring over my shoulder and chuckling about the word "blog". I told her, "That's not funny, mom! Blogs are serious business!" But she'll never understand. Also three doctors were here. (In reverse alphabetical order) One's name was Steve, another was John, and another was Amish. Amish surfs, John plays guitar (like a real pro!), and Steve gets overly excited and spouts facts about trees uncontrollably. Here's something he said once: "Man, if you brought a pair of binoculars out here to the clinic, you could have a field day! Holy cow!" A typical conversation with Steve went:
Schlomo: Hey, Steve.
Steve: Holy cow! I can't believe it's you! I haven't seen you in like 5 minutes!
Schlomo: I've got bad news, Steve.
Steve: Great! I love news!
Schlomo: Brad Pitt died today.
Steve: What?! I can't believe it! That's terrible!
Schlomo: Hey, Steve, check out that ant hill!
Steve: Holy cow! What the hell do you thinks inside that thing? I'd love to get a hold of a hammer so I could see inside there!
So he was fun. Me and Gretchen, the nurse, translated for him and John because they're Spanish was not great. Then we had a party for my mom. It was an aloha party. John sang a song, Derek sang a song, I sang a song, and Dr. Suarez a Bolivian doctor from the Hopsital Japones sang "I can't take my eyes off of you" in Spanish. It was beautiful. I wept like a willow and lept like a frog! Or should I say, I weeped like a weelow and leaped like a frog.
I went to Samipata, the ancient city where different indigenous groups thrived (such as the Incans, the Spanish, and the Nazis). We stayed at La Vispera, a quaint little Dutch hotel/cabin place and I asked them if they would hire me, they didn't say no.
A man had a tracheotomy and can breathe a lot better. My brother helped him replace his trachea ring. He is very sweet and wrote me a little note (when he couldn't talk) that said thanks and that he can breathe tranquilly. A man came in with carcinoma and, although we cannot save his life, we are going to give him radio therapy and control his diabetes so that he might be able to live more comfortably. We are also working on getting a woman double header surgery, which will involve the removal of a polyp on her uterus and a reparation of her hernia. Man, I tell you, I haven't seen so many hernias in my life. One time I saw a fat man in a polo, but that's not quite the same thing. I also saw Rush Hour 3. Don't stop making 'em, boys!
I should also note that I got four strikes in a row in bowling, raising my score from 22 to something like 102. I was kind of "out of it" so it was a big surprise to everyone playing. I think we still lost. Also, Derek, the "green" energy guy, said this funny thing. I was putting my pants on one morning and he says to me, "Wait. You put your pants on one leg at a time?" It was the funniest thing I'd ever heard.
mike
sábado, 8 de septiembre de 2007
Blogs, blogs, blogs! What are we going to do with all of these Blogs?!
People are really starting to rave about my blogs. I'm even keeping my fingers crossed for some sponsors! Possibly from Fingers Crosserstm which is a global chain of restaurants where they serve finger foods and hang finger related things on the walls.
I'm in Bolivia. Bolivia is the least famous country in South America, but don't tell that to any Bolivians because they don't think of it as the most unfamous, but the most landlocked. In a story as old as time, Bolivians and Chileans have been fighting over who gets to keep the sea. The Bolivians say they get it. The Chileans say that they get it. The Americans say that they don't care who gets it, as long as they can influence/control the government so that they get it. This last paragraph is as beautiful as it is historical.
All of the female volunteers from the States have left, so we're feeling like a post office around here: a lot of men! We have four male medical volunteers: two residents and two fourth year students. One resident wants to go into pulmonary critical care, the other is looking into hepatology, one student wants to do general medicine, and the other wants to be an anesthesiologist. We are all very different people, which becomes clear as soon as you see us because we do not share the same body and name! Neehar is an Indian vegetarian, Greg is a tall drink of Mormon, Matt is short white guy, Joe can read and be courteous, and I can write blogs. Somehow we all manage to get along.
We are working on some surgeries right now too. One man is in the hospital having a tracheotomy performed. His wife and kid left him and he said that he was alone, so we bring his medicines to him because his family cannot. We are also trying to repair a broken heart by getting new parts for a woman's pacemaker with help from a group called Solidarity Bridge. Finally, there is a boy with a big hernia who we will be helping to have an operation hopefully this week. I think that I have been having sympathy pains for this boy because I had a hernia the other day I have yet to tell my parents about, but I just pushed it back in so I should be fine and never have to worry about anything again. Soon I expect to have a broken heart and tracheotomy (Cross your fingers!).
Yesterday I shot a rifle at a tree.
Mike
I'm in Bolivia. Bolivia is the least famous country in South America, but don't tell that to any Bolivians because they don't think of it as the most unfamous, but the most landlocked. In a story as old as time, Bolivians and Chileans have been fighting over who gets to keep the sea. The Bolivians say they get it. The Chileans say that they get it. The Americans say that they don't care who gets it, as long as they can influence/control the government so that they get it. This last paragraph is as beautiful as it is historical.
All of the female volunteers from the States have left, so we're feeling like a post office around here: a lot of men! We have four male medical volunteers: two residents and two fourth year students. One resident wants to go into pulmonary critical care, the other is looking into hepatology, one student wants to do general medicine, and the other wants to be an anesthesiologist. We are all very different people, which becomes clear as soon as you see us because we do not share the same body and name! Neehar is an Indian vegetarian, Greg is a tall drink of Mormon, Matt is short white guy, Joe can read and be courteous, and I can write blogs. Somehow we all manage to get along.
We are working on some surgeries right now too. One man is in the hospital having a tracheotomy performed. His wife and kid left him and he said that he was alone, so we bring his medicines to him because his family cannot. We are also trying to repair a broken heart by getting new parts for a woman's pacemaker with help from a group called Solidarity Bridge. Finally, there is a boy with a big hernia who we will be helping to have an operation hopefully this week. I think that I have been having sympathy pains for this boy because I had a hernia the other day I have yet to tell my parents about, but I just pushed it back in so I should be fine and never have to worry about anything again. Soon I expect to have a broken heart and tracheotomy (Cross your fingers!).
Yesterday I shot a rifle at a tree.
Mike
miércoles, 15 de agosto de 2007
Mikey's Second Blog
This blog is called Mikey's Second Blog because it's the second blog that I have written. It's about the time when I was in Bolivia also, but it has different information than the first blog that I wrote, which was also about the time I was in Bolivia, which is now. My brother told me I should start a blog. So that's what caused the blog to be started. In actuality, the blog was caused by the existence of the medical clinic at which I am currently working for. But enough about blogs.
So, Edith the former coordinator has been gone and I have taken over for her. She is dearly missed, like when a train misses a truck by just a few feet. I am doing an alright job so far, just getting my feet wet. I can speak more Spanish than before, can drive a manual transmissioned car, and have driven patients around the city of Santa Cruz so that they can get to their appointments. Daniel, the son of Dr. Douglas Villarroel (one of the founders of the clinic), says that he likes manual transmissions more than automatic ones because he feels like "I am in control of the car. When I drive an automatic, the car is in control of me." I said, "That's great. Now, can I control the radio for once?!" We had a good laugh about that, until I changed the radio station and he got mad. Then, we pulled over and had a good talk.
My parents were here. They also started the clinic. Their names are Dr. Molitch and Dr. Hou. My friends and neighbors ask me how it feels to have parents with the same first name. I always reply, "That's the least of my problems!". Everyone seemed happy to have them. My dad didn't fall asleep during anything that I'm aware of and my mom got to dress up in a lot of bright colors. I broke a bottle on the road that leads to the clinic. I thought everyone was going to yell at me, but when I was crying they said that it was okay because I was supposed to break it and that people always break bottles of champagne to christen things. That made me feel a whole lot better and have since felt completely comfortable christening just about everything. I even christened a man I met in a bar using a beer bottle. I know it's not the same, but I'm not too picky!
We had a big party for the anniversary of the clinic, celebrating six years. There was dancing and singing of the national anthem and speeches thanking the doctors who started the clinic. It was very nice and sweet. There was an old couple from a town called Warnes that did a cute dance that made me look forward to being an old man some more. The group from a town called Yapacani did a dance using really brightly colored masks that looked like monsters. I like monsters so I was a bit biased towards their dance. Also, there was a soccer tournament in which one of the medical volunteers participated. In fact, her team, the team from Palacios where the clinic is located, won the women's tournament and all the players got to take home watches as prizes.
Oh, that volunteer is new. We're currently the only two volunteers from the States here right now.
Alright, bye.
So, Edith the former coordinator has been gone and I have taken over for her. She is dearly missed, like when a train misses a truck by just a few feet. I am doing an alright job so far, just getting my feet wet. I can speak more Spanish than before, can drive a manual transmissioned car, and have driven patients around the city of Santa Cruz so that they can get to their appointments. Daniel, the son of Dr. Douglas Villarroel (one of the founders of the clinic), says that he likes manual transmissions more than automatic ones because he feels like "I am in control of the car. When I drive an automatic, the car is in control of me." I said, "That's great. Now, can I control the radio for once?!" We had a good laugh about that, until I changed the radio station and he got mad. Then, we pulled over and had a good talk.
My parents were here. They also started the clinic. Their names are Dr. Molitch and Dr. Hou. My friends and neighbors ask me how it feels to have parents with the same first name. I always reply, "That's the least of my problems!". Everyone seemed happy to have them. My dad didn't fall asleep during anything that I'm aware of and my mom got to dress up in a lot of bright colors. I broke a bottle on the road that leads to the clinic. I thought everyone was going to yell at me, but when I was crying they said that it was okay because I was supposed to break it and that people always break bottles of champagne to christen things. That made me feel a whole lot better and have since felt completely comfortable christening just about everything. I even christened a man I met in a bar using a beer bottle. I know it's not the same, but I'm not too picky!
We had a big party for the anniversary of the clinic, celebrating six years. There was dancing and singing of the national anthem and speeches thanking the doctors who started the clinic. It was very nice and sweet. There was an old couple from a town called Warnes that did a cute dance that made me look forward to being an old man some more. The group from a town called Yapacani did a dance using really brightly colored masks that looked like monsters. I like monsters so I was a bit biased towards their dance. Also, there was a soccer tournament in which one of the medical volunteers participated. In fact, her team, the team from Palacios where the clinic is located, won the women's tournament and all the players got to take home watches as prizes.
Oh, that volunteer is new. We're currently the only two volunteers from the States here right now.
Alright, bye.
jueves, 2 de agosto de 2007
Mikey's first blog!
This blog is called Mikey's First Blog. It's about the first time I made a blog, which is right now, in fact. It's called this because this is the first blog I have written. So now begins the blog part:
My name is Mike Molitch-Hou and I am in Palacios, Bolivia, the World. I am working the the Medical Clinic Humberto Parra, which is a clinic that my mom and dad and their friend Douglas invented in 2000. I got to Bolivia about two and half weeks ago or so. I was very nervous about not being able to speak Spanish. I am still nervous, but after much practice, I have gained some confidence
So far, I have tagged along with Edith who is the current coordinator. She is good at her job, I think. That is my opinion. She is very reasonable. Like a robot. Unlike our current breed of robots, she has a heart. She is able to process decisions in a very efficient manner, but also remembers people's names and birthdays and to sometimes have feelings. She never stops working, like the Energizer(TM) bunny robot, so that she is exhausted when she gets home at 9 at night. Then she writes emails to all the people in the United States letting them know how the clinic is doing.
There were two other volunteers here. They're gone now. I don't remember their names. I think one was named after a cup of coffee and the other after a Simpson's character, but I have already erased them from my memory as to not "feel" sad.
I went to Saimipata, a nice town two hours outside of Santa Cruz that has a lot of history involving Incans and a lot of conspiracy theories about aliens. It's very pretty and cold. There there is a parrot that can say "Hola" (which is some sort of Spanish I assume) and can cry like a "baby" (which is some sort of human I assume). I went with Edith, Javier, Daniel, and Nuna. They were fun. I practiced Spanish by taking the phrases I already knew and inserting new vocabulary words into them like a game of MadLibs(tm):
"Cuantos anos tienes?" was replaced with "Cuantos moleculas/muertos/miedos tienes?"
So instead of asking people how many years they had, I asked them how many molecules/dead/fears they had. I was also taught how to say, "Que te hago un hijo?" which means "So why doesn't that person make you a child?".
I tengo hambre a lot right now, so I'm going to go. This was getting long anyways.
[End Mikey's First Blog]
My name is Mike Molitch-Hou and I am in Palacios, Bolivia, the World. I am working the the Medical Clinic Humberto Parra, which is a clinic that my mom and dad and their friend Douglas invented in 2000. I got to Bolivia about two and half weeks ago or so. I was very nervous about not being able to speak Spanish. I am still nervous, but after much practice, I have gained some confidence
So far, I have tagged along with Edith who is the current coordinator. She is good at her job, I think. That is my opinion. She is very reasonable. Like a robot. Unlike our current breed of robots, she has a heart. She is able to process decisions in a very efficient manner, but also remembers people's names and birthdays and to sometimes have feelings. She never stops working, like the Energizer(TM) bunny robot, so that she is exhausted when she gets home at 9 at night. Then she writes emails to all the people in the United States letting them know how the clinic is doing.
There were two other volunteers here. They're gone now. I don't remember their names. I think one was named after a cup of coffee and the other after a Simpson's character, but I have already erased them from my memory as to not "feel" sad.
I went to Saimipata, a nice town two hours outside of Santa Cruz that has a lot of history involving Incans and a lot of conspiracy theories about aliens. It's very pretty and cold. There there is a parrot that can say "Hola" (which is some sort of Spanish I assume) and can cry like a "baby" (which is some sort of human I assume). I went with Edith, Javier, Daniel, and Nuna. They were fun. I practiced Spanish by taking the phrases I already knew and inserting new vocabulary words into them like a game of MadLibs(tm):
"Cuantos anos tienes?" was replaced with "Cuantos moleculas/muertos/miedos tienes?"
So instead of asking people how many years they had, I asked them how many molecules/dead/fears they had. I was also taught how to say, "Que te hago un hijo?" which means "So why doesn't that person make you a child?".
I tengo hambre a lot right now, so I'm going to go. This was getting long anyways.
[End Mikey's First Blog]
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